The BIG Disappointment of our Wedding Day

Enough teasing...the biggest disappointment of our wedding day was my brothers...yes, you read that correctly. Let me give you some background first. My family (me included) like to have a good time, which usually involves alcohol. We love family functions, especially weddings! We all tend to drink a little too much as well, but never usually make fools of ourselves (see where this is going yet?). In the months leading up to the wedding, my parents talked with each of my siblings (emphasis on the brothers) and let them know that no excess drinking would be tolerated. We as a family were hosting this wedding and we all needed to present ourselves in a respectable manner. Easy enough...right? Yes, you guessed it...wrong!

As with the other bridal party members, there was no drinking until after the ceremony. When we all got in the limo, the best man had purchased some champagne and we also had some beer. I think everyone had two drinks in hand at one point, so I'm not sure how my brothers pulled off what they did. I think I had 3 glasses of wine all night, but probably only finished 1 full glass, so needless to say...I didn't have time to babysit them...no one did or should have needed to. I wasn't aware of any problems until the garter toss. I think the DJ forgot to do it earlier, so when someone reminded him...it was pretty late in the evening. So, I sat in a chair on the dance floor, the guys started singing...and that's when this picture happened.


My brother M was so drunk that he was trying to get the best man (way left) to take my garter off. In this picture you can see Mr. 2SB (white vest) and GM J listening intently to me telling my brother he had no idea what was going on and that the groom takes off the garter. The rest of the garter toss went off with out a hitch (until the guys realized it was a Buffalo Bills...then no one wanted it..haha).

Not sure if this is a regional thing or not, but the DJ had announced the last dance and it was to be "The Circle Dance" where we dance in the middle and everyone forms a circle around you and every once in a while they all swarm in around you. It all started out great, but I was noticing that when certain parts of the circle would come in one of two things would happen. 1) We were showered in various beverages and 2) We were getting ran into to the point we just were hanging on to each other. So as the song was coming to an end the part of the circle with really drunk brothers and cousin were coming in. They came in so strongly that they knocked us onto the ground. The beverage covered, dirty ground...in my white dress. As you can tell, Mr. 2SB is not a small guy, but he couldn't even hold himself up...let alone me too. So, I made the cut gesture across my neck, started crying (and am tearing up as I type) and pretty much stormed out of the reception. Didn't say bye to anyone, just left. Mr. 2SB had went outside, so when I got out there he wanted to go back in and say good bye to his guys, so I just waited in our shuttle for him. As I was sitting there, pissed as all get out, I realized that neither of them danced with me during the Dollar Dance (controversial topic I know) and that hurt me even more than pushing me over at my wedding dance.

The next morning at brunch at my parents house, brother M and FSIL B arrived on time...they looked "under the weather", but so did a lot of the other people. We all had breakfast, we opened our gifts and then everyone started to get ready to go. Then Brother J finally decided to show up. He looked like $hit, I told him he smelled bad in front my new MIL and that was about it. He had "tripped" getting into his house the night before and had some pretty serious cuts and was pretty sure his nose was broken, but I considered it Karma.

I didn't say much to them that day, just wanted to leave. I was thankful that by the time we were getting ready to go, they had already left. I really didn't want to see them (can anyone blame me?). In the days after we got back from Vegas, I received various text messages from Brother J saying he missed us and seeing if we had a good time in Vegas, blah blah blah. I didn't return any of these messages. I'm not sure if he was seeing how I would react or generally thought everything was ok. Either way, he got the hint (or my mom told him) that I was none too thrilled with him. He made several attempts to call me (I drug this out...he needed to feel guilty...right?) and I didn't answer or return the calls. When I felt that he felt guilty enough (misery needs company), I finally called him back. I let him know how I felt, he apologized, I accepted his apology and said that I did forgive him, but wouldn't forget what happened and at this point we were good to go.

Now for Brother M. He and SIL B had been house hunting for around a month or so before the wedding. They were fairly consumed with this the week of the wedding and afterwards. However, this was M's excuse for taking so long to call. I really don't remember how long it took him to call, but I would guess around 2 months. It was smart of him to wait because although I was still mad and hurt, I just wanted to get it over with at that point and didn't make him suffer as much as J (sorry J). Maybe he was doing some self-torture during those 2 months, who really knows, but the conversation was very similar to the one with J's.

So after that, its all water under the bridge. You still remember the water, but I'm refusing to hold it against them for the rest of their lives. I'm not good at holding grudges (good for them) and I don't think its worth it. We all said our peace and its done...right? Well, maybe not! I don't hold grudges, but I don't mind getting revenge (insert evil smile and laugh here). Although I do not know what this will entail yet, I can guarantee you that it will be nothing like what they did to me. With M & B's wedding less than a year away, the only thing I know is that I will not be dancing with M that day. Immature...yes! Harsh...yes! Letting him know how that feels...yes! Do I care about the first 2...no! Will I dance with J on his wedding day...no. Its just how it has to be. They made that decision, not me.

You can judge me any way you want, but while you're judging, please try to put yourself in my shoes. I might be over-reacting on the revenge thing, but it has been 7 months since this all (we) went down and you can see how it still affects me. I feel good in my decision to have them both feel a little of how I felt and how they let me (and pushed me) down.

So, that was the biggest problem/bad thing we had happen all day. In the end, I keep telling myself something we were told at our Engaged Encounter weekend. It was something along the lines of how your spouse will be your #1 person in life. Your kids will move on with their lives, your parents will pass on and your siblings and friends will also move on with their lives. When all those people are gone...your spouse will always be there!

Source

The secret of a happy marriage is finding the right person. You know they're right if you love to be with them all of the time.
~Julia Childs